Get with the program at Sunday Game Night

From: Nathan
To: Game Friends

Game Friends,

Today we here at Sunday Game Enterprises are announcing an exciting new incentive program to help you drop everything else you were planning to do on this Sunday, next Sunday, fuck it, you’re going to cancel all other Sunday plans from here on out when you hear about this. That’s right babies, we’re doing R.E.W.A.R.D.S.: Rewarding Everybody Who Actually RSVPs and Delivers Snacksordrinks.

From now on, every time you RSVP to a Sunday Game Night I will assign you a number of base R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points depending on number of chuckles and whether you plan to attend. Similarly, when you arrive with a Snackordrink I will compute the Taste Factor using a proprietary algorithm and you will earn a commensurate amount of base R.E.W.A.R.D.S points. Finally, your base R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points will be modified based on your precise arrival time relative to the scheduled start time of 5pm, resulting in your Real Sum (Adjusting for Lateness) of R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points, or R∑AL R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points, which are redeemable.

So that’s our R.E.W.A.R.D.S. program. It’s been tough keeping this under wraps for so long, but I know I speak for the whole team when I say I’m excited for you all to finally start earning R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points!

Nathan

From: Kyle
To: Game Friends

Looking forward to redeeming my R∑AL R.E.W.A.R.D.S. points at the commissary for one of these sweet member tees